Now I lay me down to sleep.

Sweet baby Ryder, what, oh what has been troubling you?  Ryder was a little fussy last week on and off - we were thinking maybe teething?  Just normal baby cranky-pants-ness?  But he has been just beside himself for the last 2 days, non-stop screaming.  The only way we could get him to stop wailing and sleep for a few minutes was with some serious bouncing.  You know, the kind where you're practically doing squats wondering why on earth "bouncy" chairs can't just live up to their name.  Bouncing is harder when you are tethered to the wall & have to move in a 4 ft radius.  It's much harder when the baby turns blue and clammy when you aren't bouncing aggressively enough.  He finally started getting doses of morphine and oxygen levels started taking longer to recover.  Then last night a fever.  Then this morning the intubation.  Again.  So far we have back a normal head CT, LP, tracheal aspirate and CSF gram stain, and are waiting for some viral studies and repeat cultures.  He's on vancomycin, meropenem, and fluconazole while we wait.  After some adjusting his sedation, he is finally getting some rest...he looks very peaceful.  I wish I could get in that crib and snuggle with him, but since sleeping anywhere but this plastic couch would surely alert the crazy police (and/or social work) his trusty sugar bear is keeping a close watch through the night.  Surgery Monday has been canceled...apparently that's just not part of the plan...but that's ok - we are just along for the ride after all...

Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray the Lord my soul to keep

Intubated for the night

To rest up for my life's next fight